31 December 2010

My 2010 :)


Before I recap my 2010, let me just give you a background of what my 2009 looked like. Maybe then you'd appreciate it when I say that despite all my musings here, 2010 was a lot better. Way way better. A million times better. Just a shoutout to God for redeeming this year for me. :)

The year 2009 was a very difficult year---with me resigning from my first job, with me breaking up with my long-time boyfriend, with me losing a job opportunity abroad---a year when everything had gone wrong! This year ended with me being jobless and boyfriendless and almost penniless and prideless.

Then 2010 came. I had hopes that this was going to be a year of rebuilding dreams and reconnecting with some people who made impact in my life. Thankfully, this year started promisingly---with me getting a new job that allowed me to travel much albeit locally. As a result, I've been to places in the Philippines I never thought I'd go to. I've met diverse people, made few friends here and there. I've earned miles from PAL! Yey! :) I'm thankful to God for giving me this job, but somehow, I know deep in my heart, that this is not yet the job I've been called for. There's a big piece missing and I will try to look for this one in 2011, God permits.

All throughout the year, I struggled with bad habits that God patiently exposed in the circumstances and conflicts I encountered. I realized that until I learned the lesson God wants me to learn, I would never graduate from the same set of trials. I also realized that God is so in love with me, He would never ever leave me, even If most of the times, I'm the most unloveable creature on earth!

On the best side of this year, I received the greatest blessing in my 28-year existence on this planet! I received the Gift of Love from God, a love for keeps, exactly the kind that I prayed for since June 2010. God truly answers prayers.

Apart from receiving the Gift of Love, I thank God this year for the Gift of Salvation. I now know for sure where He is leading me. He has been leading me to Christian life all along. And I think I am ready for this. By His Grace, I know I am.

As I close this chapter of my life, I couldn't be more thankful for God... for leading me to the best life I could possibly have, for the trials that prepared me for the one He gave me to love, for the gentle glimpses of how great life can be when He is in my life, at the core center of it, breathing and living for it.

The best is certainly yet to come.

30 December 2010

That Day

Note: This note was posted in my FB in 3 January 2011, but for this personal blog, I have posted it the day it happened, the day Rolando and I officially became a couple.
***

 “I love you," he said, not for the first time since he confessed his intentions and crossed the line of our six-year friendship, but for the first time on that particular day (December 30, 2010). In a move that suprised us both, I finally uttered the words he waited patiently to hear for months---no hesitations, no stopping to reconsider, no more risk assessments, no more what ifs.

A moment of great silence enveloped us followed by mishmash of emotions.  I was scared, I was happy. Suddenly, everything that happened in the past---failed relationships, broken dreams, hurtful pruning from God---made sense.

As he locked me in a bear hug, still acting crazy and not absorbing the whole thing, I thanked God for the gift of Love and for answered prayers---my prayer, as a friend years back that he’d be able to meet Christ, my prayer that I’d be able to meet the right one and his fervent prayer for my YES.

I thank you, Author of Love, for writing this piece for him and me. May your other grander plans for our lives come true according to Your will.
    ***

Its all so strange. How can it be?
All along this love was right in front of me!
And for the first time, I am looking in your eyes.
For the first time, I am seeing who you are.
I can't believe how much I see,
When you're looking back at me.
Now I understand what love is...
Love is... For the first time.



10 December 2010

We remember moments



I have welcomed December with all my heart together with all the things attached to it: 13th month pay, chilly air, longer nights, glittery lights and grandeur christmas trees, amongst all other christmassy stuff.

Oh dear life, thank you for being so goooood, awesome gooood to me lately and sending me all these awesome moments to record in this online diary of mine, save for later recollections in life.

Cherishing every moment of it, 
Lai